The silent killer of elite performance

What’s your drive to succeed? The dream you feel called to achieve? Or the things you tell yourself you should do?

Elite performers often set high standards, maybe too high. And many often fail to manage these set expectations. That’s why they get stuck, overwhelmed, and dissatisfied, even when they’re achieving more than ever. Today we’ll explore how your own expectations may be silently killing your performance, creativity, and well-being.

🗯️ The Self-Sabotaging Pressure

Many years ago, I would beat myself up over silly things. I had great things going on for me. But at some point, I became overwhelmed, unusually underperforming, and struggling to keep up with my goals.

I got caught up in external pressures, fear of failure, and wanting to maintain relevance. Until I began to lose myself beyond the accolades and achievements. I lashed out at the slightest frustration. I blamed everyone else for my mistakes except myself.

One day, I realized I was getting consumed by the frustration of my own expectations. Fueled by things I held onto that didn’t really matter. I would say to myself:

“I can’t afford to fail”
“I can’t show my weakness”
“I must be perfect”
“I must succeed”

These self-imposed pressures caged my freedom. Freedom to live my dreams without being bound by unhealthy rules that gradually drained me and undermined my performance. Then I decided to take back control of my life. I put all those unrealistic standards behind me and pursued my dream. And I’ve lived a more meaningful and fulfilling life since then.

🧠 Your Standards Are Your Problem

It’s okay to set high standards. But allowing these standards to impose sky-high expectations on yourself is where you miss the mark. Those expectations can start turning against you.

You’ll begin to feel overwhelmed by the relentless pressure to stay on top of your game. You’ll strive to stay relevant, be perfect, and handle everything on your own. You feel you can’t show your vulnerability, you must have everything figured out, you can’t afford to fail, or shouldn’t ask for help.

The expectations keep mounting, and soon, they begin to strangle your performance. You’re chasing bigger and bigger goals, but somehow you feel more drained than accomplished. You start struggling to keep up.

You gradually become stretched thin and start falling short of your own goals. You no longer get things done like you used to. You become hesitant about opportunities because you feel you may not live up to the expectations. Thoughts of not being good enough start to creep in.

You tell yourself you’re no longer the kick-ass performer you used to be. You’ve achieved so much, yet it feels like you’re not deserving of all you’ve achieved. Your self-imposed expectations have slowly ripped away your energy.

What’s funny is people mistake high standards for ambition. And that’s something to watch out for. Ambition pushes you forward, but unhealthy expectations will hold you back.

❤️ Remain Connected to Your True Self

Keeping up peak performance starts with letting go of unhealthy expectations. When you’re in constant touch with yourself, your purpose, dreams, and desires, there’ll be no room for fear of failure or striving for perfection.

You’ll realize that it’s okay to not have all the answers. You’ll become open to exploring different paths without the pressure of immediate success. Instead of asking, “Why didn’t I achieve this goal?” you start to ask, “What did I learn from this experience?”

You’ll start to embrace your journey with all its ups and downs. You’ll begin to embrace the gap between where you are and where you want to be. Instead of getting anxious, you’ll appreciate the process. This will help you find value in the work itself, not just the outcome.

Fear, doubt, and frustration are natural responses when self-imposed expectations weigh heavily. But passion, excitement, and gratitude are reactions from aligned ambitions. You’ll wake up each day not driven by what you must achieve, but by what inspires you. Soaring, thriving, excelling, one resilient step at a time.

🤲 Execute Like an Elite Performer

After a decade of being an elite entrepreneur, I’ve learned to separate energy-draining distractions from my ambition. Here are 5 ways you can do the same:

1. Set aligned goals: Pursuing goals just because they will make you look good is the fastest way to kill your performance. You’ll get stuck because you don’t have an internal motivation that is fueling your drive. It’s going to suck, you’re going to get frustrated, you’ll most likely quit, and feel like crap for not performing well. Don’t joke with your purpose. Find it and use it to keep moving without being buried under unrealistic expectations.

2. Get brutal with priorities: This is where high achievers often fail; they want to do it all. Identify the top 3 things that move the needle toward achieving aligned goals. Not ten, not five. Just three at most. Everything else? Delegate it, postpone it, or drop it entirely. Focus on the game-changers.

3. Get off the horse of perfection: The harsh truth is you can be thorough, detailed, or accurate but you can’t be perfect. So stop building a mental chase for perfection. You’re creating an enemy with yourself. Because that chase is going to drain your energy. Move fast, refine later.

4. Create boundaries for recovery: Performance is unsustainable without recovery. Block out non-negotiable time on your calendar for yourself. Take breaks, give yourself time to think, recover, rest, recharge, and reset. You can dedicate days to a hobby or activity that rejuvenates you — hiking, or spending time with family. Make these recovery periods as important as your most crucial work commitments.

🎯 Drop The Pressure

If there isn’t any external pressure, what self-expectations will you drop today? True excellence isn’t about impossible standards but about consistent growth.

You’re human, flawed, evolving, and capable of immense resilience. Don’t try to be a perfect robot, so you don’t grow weary of the journey you started happily.

In the words of Brené Brown: “The expectations we impose on ourselves can be the heaviest burden of all.”

If you want to live up to your greatest potential, let go of that burden.

P.S: Are you frustrated by your own expectations? Identifying your purpose on earth is the ticket to lasting success void of unhealthy pressures. Reply to this email, and I’ll walk you through the process of identifying and owning your unique space in the world. On your own terms.